next weekend, all of the my mommy friends from H's play group are planning a day trip to napa for wine tasting. it is one of the girl's birthdays and she's renting a limo for the entire day to take all of us mommies on a day getaway where we can relax, get drunk, and enjoy a few hours to ourselves. the plan is for the babes to stay home with the daddy's. you would assume that i would be jumping up and down at the opportunity, but i have to be honest, getting this invitation sent me into full on panic mode. my mind skipped over the whole girls-day-out-fun that would be awaiting me and instead immediately fixated on the fact that this outing would mean each mommy would be leaving her baby for the entire day. all. day. long. even though H is almost six months old, i still haven't left him for more than three hours and that was once to get my hair done. does this make me a weird mom? i know that dustin is fully capable of taking care of the little man without me and my mom has been a pediatric nurse for over 30 years so i know that the little man is in great hands when he is with her, but i still can not stand leaving him.
today at playgroup, the girls chattered excitedly about which wineries to visit, where to grab lunch, and how drunk they would be. the whole thing sounded like it was going to be a blast and as i listened with a smile plastered on my face, my palms grew cold and clammy, my forehead began to perspire, and my heart started pounding in my chest as butterflies fluttered about in my stomach at the thought of leaving H. i decided not to go. i can't bear it. does any other mommies feel the same way about leaving their little ones? or is this just me?