like all new mamas, i had high ambitions of  halloween and the amazing family costume ensemble that i was going to make for the three of us.  we had decided months ago that holden just had to be bam bam... well, because you can guess why.  dustin and i were going to be barney and betty...and we thought it was going to be just about the cutest thing in the world.

and then a few weeks ago, when i still had yet to step foot into the fabric store, i started thinking about our costume choices and realized that holden would have no idea who bam bam, barney, or betty was.  and i decided that we should probably choose halloween costumes that holden would actually recognize and like.  his two favorite things at the moment are monkeys, pumpkins, and spiders, and i knew that holden would love to see us dressed up as something he actually loved.

on a trip to old navy, i came across a monkey costume.  and although it may not be unique, holden couldn't stop screeching like a monkey and pretending to eat the attached banana...so that was that.

holden's favorite book is two little monkeys, about two monkeys named cheeky and chee who escape up a tree from a leopard.  we attended a few halloween parties as cheeky, chee, and the leopard at the bottom of the tree.  we knew that no one else would know who we were, but it was fun for the three of us.

but holden's monkey costume was a fleece sweatsuit and with the temperature in the 80's he couldn't really wear the monkey suit for more than a few minutes.  so i started searching for a more weather-appropriate costume.  i stumbled upon a children's consignment store that was selling costumes half off and i couldn't resist a pumpkin costume for $6.  dustin's mom had two pumpkin costumes that she had made for dustin years and years ago (i think he actually wore one in elementary school) so she sent them up to us and we trick-or-treated as a family of pumpkins.  maybe a little more ridiculous than cute, but i think holden's reaction to us dressed in pumpkin costumes was worth it.

holden loved trick-or-treating.  he was actually quite brazen going up to each door, usually attempting to walk into their house, and picking out a special treat.  he didn't eat any of the candy, i'm not even sure he knew what you were supposed to do with it, but he carried around one in each hand until they melted.

dustin and i held hands as we walked home, asking ourselves in disbelief how we were parents trick-or-treating with our child.

i think first experiences with holden will always feel like that.